Adulting is not rocket science

Earlier in the year I wrote this on High School and Gaming

I do get it.  Being a part of gaming culture allows you to act in ways you may not in real life, may allow you to stand up to people you feel are being bullies, maybe in a way that you do not realize be a bully yourself.  The funny thing about the internet and gaming culture is at some point in time, eventually you will run across people that have known you from the past.  You may have been the kid picked on in High School, not had many friends in College, lead a mostly solitary life without many friends, yet in the anonymous world we inhabit you could be the most outspoken champion of all the things, the person people look up to for help and guidance, the popular person that everyone wants to be friends with.  Until some day comes when a person from your past comes along and threatens your whole imaginary world.

The problem with trying to make yourself into something other than yourself is that unless it is helping you work through issues, helping you become more assertive, more confidant, more social, etc.  It is all just a false persona.  And eventually something will slip, and people will start to look closer at you.  You may lash out at others to deflect prying eyes, may pull out old conversations had years ago that you have held on to for use at some future time to show the world, “Hey look at this, they are not a great person, see!! proof.

I have been out of High School for 34 going on 35 years, I am 53 years old, have been married 18 years, I have a home, I have cats, I have worked for the same company for 30 years.  And for me, High School was 2 lifetimes ago.  The clubs and groups, and wanting to be a part of the in crowd, it just doesn’t matter.  The people you so desperately want to get approval from, want to hold you in high esteem, in all reality probably will be a distant memory to you in 10 years.  How many friends from Elementary school do you still hang out with regularly, how many from High School, from College, from your first full time job, that you grew up with.

Life is ever changing, you change, your friends change, you develop different likes and dislikes.  Trying to put value on yourself by having the most followers, or the you follow thousands, does not make you any more special to others.  How you interact with people every day, even saying something good about someone you may not know, or even like, is all part of being an adult.  Like the title say, it’s not Rocket Science, it is however very hard some days, when you have to put aside petty reasons to not like a person, and stand with them because someone is not treating them right, to be a white knight to a person you normally would just let deal with issues on their own.

Every day, there are flare ups with those that exist in this virtual community.  It is not even a small town, it is a large city with many neighborhoods of cultures and communities within communities, friends exist in many, they may like you for some reasons, and others that you do not care for.  It is all about respect for a fellow human being.  Being willing to acknowledge that maybe someone told them something about you that may or may not be 100% true, may have shaped an entire conversation about things you have done to portray you in a bad light.  It is all to easy to jump to conclusions with the written word, and any lie portrayed with some truth can be simple to believe.  Just as it is easy to believe a truth about a person is a lie.

In life, just try to be good to other people, whether you agree with them or not.  There is no need to stand on the soap box endlessly pointing at the faults of others to conceal your own.  Be yourself, it is the only way to truly make friends that will span your lifetime.


One thought on “Adulting is not rocket science

  1. I usually read your posts when the pop up on Twitter but managed to miss this one.

    It’s very true what you say in this piece but I also think that it’s also really only something that you can truly understand with age. Be good to people and do the right thing by them, because that’s the right way to live your life – forget using religion, race, gender or social status as your reason to like/dislike another person.

    Be yourself? I try, despite hiding behind a male belf avatar of my WoW main because the real me isn’t quite yet ready to be fully myself in the online world.

    Liked by 1 person

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